THE iKiFit BLOG

Join iKiFit founder, Kim Macrae for inspirational and thought provoking topics around all things, education, life choices, self empowerment and assessment - set to challenge us all to be the best version of ourselves - Every Single Day in lots of little ways!
(Click below to hear iKi Crews Every Single Day excerpt, full version for sale on iTunes).

Qualified Life Coach and Fulltime working mother of 3 - Amy takes you on a journey of how iKi SRL has empowered her through the most challenging times of raising 3 children and remaining a model of what it means to be happy, healthy, strong.

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Look, Listen - put that technology down!

Tuesday, November 14, 2017

 

Recently I was doing some additional hours from home on an urgent work project and was frantically juggling my work hat, domestic hat, wife hat and mum hat, all the while with a deadline looming over my head.

I had set Mr. 3 up in the lounge-room near me, around me, just not on me! - to play happily on the floor whilst I kept plugging away at my work.

Every now and then he would come up and show me the latest masterpiece he had built with his bright coloured bricks. Each time, only a few bricks differed from the previous sample.

Over a period of half an hour I obviously got a bit less enthusiastic with my responses of "Wow, aren't you clever, can you build something even bigger for Mummy" or "Cool, Buddy you are such a big boy being able to build that all by yourself" - or at least they must not have been to an acceptable standard, as suddenly Mr 3 was sitting up on top of me, squishing my face in his hands and pulling my head towards him.

I stopped what I was doing and looked at him, trying to breathe and not lose my temper, as the 'deadline pressure' washed over my whole body.

With my squished face like a ball of play dough in his chubby little hands, he eye balled me and in his most 'teacher-like' voice said "Mummy, Look, Listen & Learn Mummy. You not listen to me Mummy".

I said "I'm sorry darling, Mummy has been busy doing my work and you have been such a good boy playing by yourself while I do that. Why did you say I need to 'Look, Listen & Learn?"

Mr 3 said "I was talking a you and you not looking at me, you not listen to me Mummy. I love you this much (stretching his arms out wide) BUT you need to listen to me and look at me when I tell you".

NOW - Firstly can I just point out - how early the iKi Rulz stick for a child when embedded from an early age (both at home and at long day care - I can't take all the credit). Secondly, how brilliant that my Mr 3 understands how to apply them, and to voice how my behaviour is making him feel.

SO - What do we learn from this? It's like the saying goes "Do as I say, not as I do" Except not, it's "Do as I say and as I do" If we expect our children to grow into the happy, healthy, strong, respectful, contributing members of society we so want them to be - then we need to show them what that looks like. Because they ARE watching and they ARE listening! And they ARE learning all the time!!

When we ask our children to look at us when we are speaking to them, if we expect them to not continue playing their technology, then we must do the same. If we ask our children to use their inside voices and use words not actions to describe how they are feeling, then we must do the same. If we want our children to grow up to respect themselves, their siblings, their neighbours - then we must do the same.
So, in case you need some help with the basics, like I did (thanks Mr 3 for the shake up) - here is a little reminder:

1. Look, Listen, Learn - look and listen and you will learn and allow others to learn also.
2. I'm Ok, You're Ok - treat others the way you wish to be treated.
3. No Play, No Play - if you don't play by the rules there may be consequences.
4. Eat Well, Live Well - eat a healthy, balanced, nutritious diet and you will live a happy healthy life.
 
To get some help implementing these core life values into your home and get the whole family working as a Happy, Healthy, Strong
Team - why not sign up for an online membership - find out more by clicking here

 

Enjoy your week, Active Aspiring Amy. 

 


Forcing apologies or modelling empathy!?

Thursday, July 13, 2017

Forcing apologies out of our children, when quite frankly, they really aren't that sorry!


This is a hot topic in my household right now and I just found this great article which helped put things into perspective a little around what age a child really understands empathy. It would seem that Ive had it all wrong in expecting my 2 yr old to say sorry and mean it, or my 6 yr old for that matter. And it goes to show that role modelling is really the best form of parenting there is and one day when our children have matured enough they will be equipped to respond appropriately in most contexts. In the meantime we can use iKi Rulz such as "Im Ok, You're Ok" (treat others the way you want to be treated) to plant the seed with our children around what may be the appropriate way to approach situations when they have hurt someone accidentally or otherwise. To find out more about the iKi Rulz and how to use them in the home click here